Writing your own vows? Many people have a feeling that when they write their own wedding vows it makes their wedding ceremony more of a personal experience. For some people, writing your wedding vows can be a piece of cake, but for others, it’s a nerve-racking, awful experience. It’s not a terrible experience because you have nothing good to say, it’s terrifying because you don’t want to sound like a total chump at the altar but you also don’t want to sound completely cheesy and irrelevant either.
Writing Your Own Vows
Writing your own vows means speaking from your heart, speaking about what comes to your heart about your dearly beloved. This isn’t something that you search the internet for or pray that your best friend can help you with. Honestly, this is a task that you have to take care of all on your own.
Related:Â How to Write Wedding Vows That Will Make You Cry With Joy
Where To Start
The first thing you should do when you sit down to write the greatest thing you’ll ever write is to make a list. Make a list of all the things that make you happy, your favourite thing about the other person, and three of your favourite memories together.
This will give you a good starting ground. You don’t have to include every little thing you’ve written down, but pick from things here and there. Also, it may be helpful to know if you want to write your vows with your fiancé or separately. Writing them together may give you more uniform vows, whereas writing them separately gives you a great element of surprise on your big day.
Things To Include
Write about the past, present and future. This gives you a broad spectrum of things to cover, while showing that you expect to be with your fiancé from here on out. You’ll find things you didn’t know you wanted to include.
Things To Not Include
Where there is a list of things to include in your wedding vows, there is also a list of things not to include. You don’t want to bring up things that have bad memories attached to them, like exes or death. This may sound like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised how people try to make “funnies” out of things like that and fail.
Now You’re Ready To Write
Now that you’ve got your list, you can start writing your wedding vows. When you sit down to write your vows, be sure that you have no distractions. If you need music instead of dead silence, that is ok. But generally, you want to have a clear mind to get what you need to be written, done.
It’s Okay
Once you’ve written your vows, read them aloud. You are going to have to do this when you stand before your family and God, so you should probably see how it sound. If you feel like a total idiot reading them aloud, good. That’s normal. Reading aloud will also give you the opportunity to see if you need add anything or take anything out. Don’t forget those serious moments, funny ones and other inside jokes that define you as a couple.
If you’ve read what you’ve written out loud and found that you totally hate what you’ve written, it’s ok to go back and either revise or re-write your vows completely. Normally when you write from the heart, it is more meaningful and special rather than a perfectly written novel.
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Before and After
Once you’ve got your vows personalized, written, and where you want them. Keep them somewhere safe. If you choose to share your vows with your fiancé, be sure that you read them aloud to each other. Personally, I think the element of surprise is pretty great.
The one big thing that I suggest though? Keep your handwritten vows in a safe place before and after the wedding. When you’re up at the altar, more than likely you won’t remember a word that was said. Keeping your vows after will give you a chance to read them and cherish them.
Conclusion
Writing your vows doesn’t have to be a terrifying, awful experience. You can write your vows in as little as five minutes and they would probably still be personal and special. But if you really want to wow your fiancé, take the time to add a sentiment to your vows. You know you’re winning if you evoke laughs, tears, and smiles. Don’t fret, just breathe. Happy planning.
Guest post courtesy of Kayla Rigler.
Related:
- How to Write Wedding Vows That Will Make You Cry With Joy
- Ultimate Reasons Why You Need Wedding Planning Checklist
- Best Things to Write in a Wedding Card
- Ultimate Wedding Planning Checklist
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